An Open Letter about being “Busy”
Today I want to write an open letter to ever mother who feels like they are hardly holding on anymore. I see you.
I know sometimes you feel like you will just never be able to catch up. Like the people you love most are stepping on the very last drops of energy you possess. I know sometimes you feel unheard, hurt or frustrated.
I want you to know that you are not alone.
This week I wrestled with something and I want to share it with you.
I have always tried to be positive but also authentic. You will see photos with mess in the background. My hair does what it wants. Sometimes I am tired or too frustrated with parenting to get the writing that I want to get done on paper. I don’t sugar coat things. I try really hard to show you the full picture. And over the last few weeks I have shared with you the moments that have bought calm on my frazzled days. My self care in my hugely busy weeks. And my currently growing lists of projects that need more of my time than ever before.
And then a thought struck me. In sharing this have I been normalising being ‘busy’? Have I been actually adding to the pressure that mothers feel by sharing all this?
That was very uncomfortable to sit with to be honest. See I have always struggled with imposter syndrome – that feeling that I am not ‘enough’ to share, teach or mentor. It has been really hard to show my own struggles because I was terrified that it would ‘prove’ that mean girl voice right. Over the last years I pushed through that mindset because I knew how important it was for women to see something real beside the perfectly curated Pinterest and Instagram feeds. I knew as mothers we need to know we aren’t alone and that progress is possible. I am not perfect, but I know how far I have come.
Then this year bought new opportunities and with it – new pressures and struggles.
I launched my membership in July and we dug into our first topic in August. The feedback has been amazing – lightbulb moments galore. Then I was approached by a few people to help with admin tasks in their businesses! What an opportunity to work with like minded women to help grow their businesses! It has been an incredible few months and I am so excited to keep working with them in the future.
Suddenly, I have had more projects to keep in the air and life got really busy. And I shared that with you. I shared my excited about my growing membership. The process of creating all that bomb.com content. And I shared my joy about all the things I was learning from working in other businesses.
But this week I had to stop and ask if I was actually encouraging Mums or if I was adding pressure to those who already feel unsteady and like they cannot keep up?
So this is what I learned as I sat with this.
Busy isn’t always a bad thing. But – what we need to look at is if we are being busy for the sake of being busy, or if we are being busy because we are intentionally growing projects that we are passionate about and actioning change in our lives that moves us forward?
I also learned to look at my boundaries. If my busyness takes away my ability to care for myself or my family then I am too busy. Healthy boundaries are essential. This means saying no to projects that are not aligned with my values and knowing my own limits on what I can handle.
I’ve learned that being intentional doesn’t mean that every day is going to be perfect or productive or inspired or energetic. The busier I am, the more essential it is to work with my ebbs and flows. Not every day is going to be a great day for creating at the computer and not every day is going to be a day where I have the stamina to power through housework. Being intentional with my time means utilizing my strengths and protecting my needs.
So do I think that it is possible to be busy and be intentional? Absolutely yes! Do I think that every woman should be ‘busy’? No. We are all at different stages with different values, visions and timelines. I am not going to advocate for busy for the sake of busy. This is my time to grab the opportunities I have been given and be as intentional as I can in the process of working on those projects and nurturing myself and my family. So am I going to keep sharing the less than perfect side? Yes, I am. With great care taken to ensure that I am teaching kindness, alignment and intention in the season of being busy.
In a fortnight I actually choose to open the doors to my membership again. There is busyness right now as I prepare for that day and I plan the content that I am going to deliver. In that process, I am stepping up authentically to link arms with these women and help them move forward with intention.
We are actively seeking to create lives in alignment with values. Lives full of Purpose. We are together learning new skills and habits to move us forward. And my Purpose right now is to embrace the busy that this brings and utilize that time to impact lives. Showing up exactly as I am in the season I am and sharing all the wonderful things that life has taught me.
If you would like to check out more about On Purpose Membership please head over here – you can jump on the waitlist for when doors open too 😉
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